Just your friendly neighborhood demigod

She is my beotch ♥

yoncevevo:

*listens to Ariana Grande once*
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(via guy)

clashboarding:

when ur mom gives u money to buy something and forgets to ask for the change

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(Source: milfdud, via guy)

embarrassmental:

narcotic:

what if people named their kids when they turn 18 so the kid has a name that fits its personality

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(via guy)

  • Me: *during sex* ....i think i hear someone coming....
  • girl: ....who?
  • me: MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE *bust nut*

canadad:

how dare this younger generation enjoy casual hookups and temporary dating…back in my day we got married to our first crushes when we were 18 and ended up unhappy by the time we were 40

(via dejected--dreamer)

betalars:

friend-zoning guys is horrible. it is disgusting. funzone them instead. send them to a small childs park so they can cry with the other babies when they dont get what they want.

(Source: plutoroyal, via guy)

u-ok:

(brushes crumbs off bed) yea baby hop on in

(via cunthonyy)